A simple rule of thumb that I use when working with people: don’t ask anyone to do something that you are not willing to do yourself. There are many reasons for this, but the main one is simply that leading by example is the best way to get people to stop hesitating. We all build up walls between ourselves and pain. We avoid embarrassment, discomfort, and being the focus of negative attention. But what if we could be free of these worries, and simply act out of a desire to be ourselves, to have fun? What if we did things because they were enjoyable rather than for the applause?
Choice is a huge deal for high school students. As they hit their teenage years, they begin to step away from their parents and move out into the world. School, work, social life, sports, driving, and leisure time are suddenly their choice to make. This gives them a chance to try new things, become responsible, and begin to mature. It also gives them a chance to hurt themselves, get involved with any number of conflicts, and to fail. We all fear failure, and we all try to avoid it, but high schoolers are especially fearful of being exposed with their vulnerabilities shown to everyone else. So, many kids do the same thing I did in high school, they wear a mask. No matter what it is, a mask is safer than showing your heart to others. It could be filling a stereotype, it could be adopting new (cooler) interests, it could be “faking it” through whatever commitments they have in a given day. The point is, there are very few safe moments for a teenager to be free from these pressures, to be themselves, to be a kid.
So, recognizing these things, we do crazy things at Young Life Club - including diving face first into chocolate pudding. We socialize, play games, and sing silly songs with one main purpose - to show these students that it’s safe here. They can be themselves, they can be goofy and imperfect, and they can fail. No matter how small that failure is, that’s a significant departure from their daily life. Grades, athletic achievement, work, even time with family often come with expectations of success. One failed test, one missed catch, one late timecard, one messed up argument can lead to many consequences. The ability to fail and be human for one evening a week is a precious thing.
This time of vulnerability leads directly into the talk where kids hear about Jesus, a Savior and God who lowered Himself and spoke to people as they were - broken, sinful, diseased individuals. Yet, He loved them, touched them, healed them, forgave them, and died for them. He gives His grace to even the biggest failure. Suddenly, this adolescent realizes that maybe unattainable perfection isn’t the goal in life after all. Maybe this Jesus has some answers. Maybe He will love me too.
